A short film: Brunch

I have all these screenplays rolling around in my head and laptop, but I just can't seem to sit down and finally finish them. Instead, little scenes flit through my head at night and keep me up. I can't tell you the number of times I've had AMAZING ideas float by as I'm drifting to sleep.

"I'm gonna get up and write that down," I tell myself sleepily. "Oh, no, errrrmmmm, too tired. But it's so amazing, I'm SURE I'll remember it in the morning."

Of course I never do. Which is why I'm starting with a short film. It's called "Brunch" and it's about two girls going out to...well, brunch.


“Brunch”

The scene:

Two twenty-something girls over-trendily dressed, in line at a coffee shop with requisite Mac laptops. Both order ridiculous coffee drinks:

Coffee guy decked out in cardigan and non-prescription glasses: Hey.

Susie: Hi. Um, where is your soy milk from?

Guy sighs. It’s from a locally owned farm five minutes outside of Austin. It’s harvested using only solar panels and workers from a halfway house in a cooperative program designed to create productive members of society while also teaching them sustainable farming methods and where to buy TOMS shoes.

Susie: Ok great. Can I get a salted caramel soy latte no whip?

Liz: Yeah, and I’ll just have the Oaxacan blend with rice milk and low-glucose plant extract, thanks.

Girls go sit down at table in corner, pull out laptops, iPhones, text and type for two minutes without a word until Guy brings coffee over.

Susie: OMG I’m so stoked about brunch today!

Liz: For realz. I’m starved. It’s like, can I go nom nom yet?

Susie: No…we’ve got an hour. New hours: four to six now.
Liz: God, I’m so glad they pushed brunch hours back. It’s like, what kind of person gets up before 2 on a Sunday??

Susie: I know, totes! Like, if you’re at all cool you’re out partying all night and a decent hangover should take several hours to recover. Two to vomit. And two to watch a Real Housewives marathon.

Liz: And two to pick out a “I’m hungover but still cute in my jeggings look!”

Both laugh.

Susie: Omg. Zach was out with Ariel last night.

Liz: OMG. WTF. IRL?

Susie: Oh, god no. That would be so effed. But they were tweeting each other all night.

Liz: So tacky! Did they check each other in on FB?

Susie: Totes did. And he made her the mayor of Common Grounds, which used to be OUR fair trade free wifi coffee shop.

Liz: Eff him, Susie. You can do so much better. Like he does not deserve you. Like you are better than him.

Susie: I know. You’re so right. Girl power. Like I just wanna go home, put on my Victoria’s Secret sweat pants, and watch Oxygen and eat Weight Watchers three point desserts.

Liz: But Suze, we’ve got brunch!! Look, we’ll totes get a mimose. Or a bellini and and a Bene.

Susie: Bene?

Liz: Hello, Eggs Benedict? Grab your tote and let’s get the eff out of here.

Susie gets busy on her iPhone when she hears a ping.
Liz: Did he DM you?

Susie: No. He commented on my status update on FB.

Liz: Who friended who?

Susie: he did, but I followed his tumblr and reblogged his cat photo.

Liz: what’s your Netflix compatibility?

Susie: only 65% but we share a love of local indie rom coms starring Michael Cera.

Liz: Did he like your Vimeo profile pic?

Susie: He hasn’t seen that one but it’s the same as my OKCupid and he totes thinks I look like Kate Bosworth in it.

Liz: What’s his graphic tee shirt selection like?

Susie: He’s got some vintage Yacht Rock bands and a fair amount of camp counselor, plus some decently obscure East Coast public access children’s TV shows thrown in.

Liz: Loves.

Susie: I know, right? And did I tell you he bought one of my hand-sewn birdhouses on Etsy?

Liz: The one out of buttons or shells?

Susie: Neither. The one out of dead baby birth certificates and wine corks.

Liz: Oh god, that one was so expensive!

Susie: I know, right. It has to mean he likes me. He said he’s gonna use it for his wallpaper in his Pilates room.

Liz: Suze, you guys are like soul mates. You HAVE to at least sext with him.

Susie: I know, I know.

Girls get up, grab purses, and leave coffee shop.